Walter Payton

Well for the last 3 weeks I have been tutoring 4th and 5th graders at the local elementary school. As we all know children say the most darnedest things but I feel like the children in the Stillwater public school system take the cake. One of the classes I help with there are 3 Arabic boys and they are always passing notes in Arabic and talking about how messy one of the boys handwriting is. I always hope they get caught and the teacher tries to read the note in class. My very first day a 4th grade girl asked me if I was married. Once I told her no she asked what my girlfriends name was, and I told her I didn't have one. She got really mad at me and informed me that her 17 year old sister already has a boyfriend and I need to hurry up. Then she saw my tattoo and told me if I'm old enough to have a tat I'm old enough to have a girlfriend and that I need to get my priorities in order So now everyday the first thing she asks me is if I got a girlfriend. Today during class they watched a video promoting the field trip they are taking next week to this place called JA Bizztown. Apparently it's this place where kids get to be the adults and work and sign checks and all the stuff they are missing out on my being 11. During the video one of the kids in the video (with amazing acting skills) said something along the lines of I wish there was a place where kids could work all day just like an adult. The male teacher under his breath looks at me and says, "There is, it's called sweatshops." Last week there was a boy making fun of this little black girl for having fake hair attached to her real hair. She looks at him and says, "Do you realize how hard it is for a woman of color to get her hair just right"? Overall the kids are really sweet and the money isn't awful, but I have yet to find a cougar.

A few weeks ago I went to the Oklahoma State fair in Oklahoma City and it was the exactly how I imagined it. It was full of rides, food, and people whose IQ matched how many teeth they had left. I love carneys they are so interesting to talk to. I feel like they really like me because every time I go they always offer me special deals. Like for the price of 3 they offered me 5 darts to pop the balloons! I mean with an offer like that I had to accept. My absolute favorite thing is the dunking booth. Being made fun of is a good thing. If a stranger makes fun of you by your physical appearance you will know what to work on. My friends are rarely honest with me so once I year I get the angry clown to tell me what I need to work on. This year he was telling me my ears were big but I couldn't really hear him because I dunked him on the very first shot. I'm not saying I'm the best but there are very few who are better than me at baseball. So out of the 5 balls I was given I dunked him 4 times. The next guy didn't realize I was John Grant so he tried to go after me and was there for about 15 minutes and didn't hit him once, sucks to suck.

I'm really not conceited and full of myself, but there is truth in every joke.

Later, JG

Justin Deaton

I love Jesus. If you know me then hopefully this won't come as a surprise. Just keep that in mind while the 7 of you who actually read this read this. The wise Rhett Pierce once said "I love basketball and I love women, but I hate woman's basketball." So I was thinking of two other things I enjoy on their own, just not together. I love pudding and I love pants, just not a fan of pudding pants. I love riding around in a wheelchair, and I love people who are handicapped, but its just not as fun being with a handicapped person and only one wheelchair because that means I have to walk and they can do wheelies. I love christians and I love Facebook, but I cannot stand christians on Facebook. Remember these are my opinions and my beliefs, these are in noway true for everyone this is just how I perceive it. I know we are to go into all the world and share the gospel so I'm sure that means Facebook as well but I think we should strive to do it in a less annoying way. Here are a few statues of a friend of mine. "Lets be honest it's easier to talk to God about men, then it is to talk to men 

about GOD. - Ray Comfort..only 2% of CHRISTians really witness - Bill Bright.......Get out and share CHRIST may we witness!! Be strong!! Be courageous!! It is our privilege to share CHRIST!!! Glory to GOD!! Go out to the highways and hedges!!" Okay that isn't  too bad, just full of awesome cliches. Here is another one that really stuck out to me: Everyone....My word...GOD is beyond words...HE is Indescribable..HE loves you!....He- GOD...LOVES you......I pray today if you do not know JESUS CHRIST....please asking HIM into your life today...Im going to ask you to do something please watch the video on my wall entitled Eric Ludy- The Gospel...To the lost- ask HIM to save you, repent of your sin...to the CHRISTian- We have a command to be obeyed...not a suggestion..a Command...may we do it today..love you guys..GLORY TO GOD! I feel if I saw that and I wasn't a christian I would just be really confused. I would have so many questions but my first question would be if his CAPS lock button was 

messing up while he was typing. Take it for what its worth I just feel like if we are going to live for Jesus He does deserve the best. So if we are called to give Him the best than why do Christians have the worst music, movies, and cliches. There are so many awful christian cliches out there so I decide to make a top 10 list of terrible cliches and phrases.

10- You need to get saved

9- Hells too hot and eternity is too long 

8- Now with everyones eyes closed and heads bowed raise your hand if you aren't 100% sure of your 
     salvation 

7- Hate the sin not the sinner

6- I have 3 unspoken prayer request

5- God is doing some big stuff here. (I'm pretty sure God does big stuff everywhere, not just America) 

4- If you have secular friends than you may have a heart issue.  

3- We had 17 people accept Christ tonight (Why do numbers matter and usually 6 of those same people   
     accepted last week)

2- (insert anything Toby Mac has ever said in his life)

1- If your booty moves to the music before your heart does than you need to change the station. 

I'm really not bitter for being spiritually abused in high school, I find it pretty entertaining now. I just feel sorry for those so stuck in their own ways they miss out and never realize that there is more to their American fun-sucking Jesus than what they have been brainwashed into thinking. There was one time when I brought my NIV to the strictly KJV only Bible study and how much trouble I got in for bringing it. I could have brought in a Koran in and gotten less flack for it, mostly because most the people there probably had no idea what a Koran was. One of the girls told me that I was using the "Satan Bible" and also it was the New Idiots Version, they were really clever. 


So as a man there are certain unspoken man rules. Like whenever you're in the bathroom at the urinal you can only look straight ahead, never talk to the stranger next to you and never ever make eye contact with the person next to you. If you have to use a stall the handicapped stalls are always fair game, but if you walk out and there is a actual handicapped person waiting to go than you better start limping or appear handicapped. 


Here is an updated life plan. Find 3 other guys and move to LA for the summer. Get a job as a waiter to pay rent and audition for everything available just to get my name out there. I'm so tired of not being famous I mean I just broke 1,000 Facebook friends, only 1,000 how weak is that? After I become famous, move to 

Australia and become Australian. 

"I use to play sports then I realized you can buy trophies. Now I'm good at everything" -Demetri Martin

Later, JG

Kristin Chenoweth

Whenever you think of John Grant you immediately think of a 4th grade teacher right? That is exactly why you will find me every Monday Wednesday and Friday at Will Rodgers Elementary school tutoring 4th graders. Today was my first day and it was awesome. Not awesome as in I really enjoy helping kids learn how to read good and do other things good too, but awesome as in the kids say some of the funniest stuff ever. Like today when I was helping the teacher who was a little bit scattered one of the girls told me that she usually isn't this crazy but she had coffee and a red bull this morning. I also had a kid try to hustle me with some Dragon Ball Z cards. He told me that each card he had was worth $5 on ebay but he would sell all 36 of his cards to me for $100. They were a neat item but I had to get it for the right price. A lot of times 4th graders will come in with items that have a lot of sentimental value but I'm about money so we weren't able to make a deal or do any paper work (first one to message me and can name that reference gets a shout out in my next blog). My biggest fear about being a tutor is having a kid piss in my backpack. Seriously with my bag plus the books inside, someone could buy a moped. All kids under the 9th grade seem the same to me. I told this one kid to go back to his seat in my nice voice and he told me that he wasn't a 2nd grader and to talk to him like a young man, brat.

It's pretty obvious that I'm a big deal but I didn't realize how popular I was going to become within the first three weeks of school. I'm terrible with names and white people look exactly the same to me so I seriously don't call anyone I've met by their name. It's always a hey man or how's it going sport. I'm not sure how long I can keep this up.

Tomorrow the OSU game is on ESPN and myself and some friends have been camping out since Monday night. You all should watch and look for me, I will be painted all orange and wearing my black Speedo.

Apart from tutoring I also sell my plasma as a form of income. The people at the clinic are so nice and friendly they boost my self esteem every time I go in. They are always telling me how nice my veins are and how diseaseless my body is. There are two black guys who work there so they are hilarious, that just goes without saying. Every time they tell me I look like a celebrity. The first time I was told I look just like James Marsden, told you I like these people. Yesterday I was told I look just like Stiffler. I mean I usually get Brad Pitt or Matt Damon but those guys aren't bad either. Selling plasma is looked down upon because people who usually sell are prostitutes and drug dealers. I sell because it really helps people and I need money. It's a win win. Plus I just want to help those around me, and by giving up and hour of my week and 32 ounces of my plasma I can make a difference in Stillwater (plus I really need root beer money).

"I think crime pays, the hours are good and you travel a lot"

Later, JG

Presidential Debate

Well it has been way too long since I have blogged last. So much has happened so here is a quick recap. Summer was great, I sweat a lot, now I'm back in school. That being said I have noticed that there are a few differences between Liberty University and Oklahoma state. I'm not going to bash LU because honestly there are a few great people out there, but I didn't quite realize how weird that school really is until I went to a state school. So here is a list of the things that come to mind: at OSU people treat you like an adult, girls are allowed in your room even when the door is shut, ESPN in my room, teachers don't take attendance, laundry is free, when you get a package it is actually delivered to your dorm, our football team is nationally ranked, you can wear hats in class and wear whatever you want to, no curfew, the girls here aren't desperately trying to get married, and we have Greek life. But to be fair LU had some things OSU doesn't. Including: trampoline basketball, mandatory chapel with the same message 3 times a week, fines other than parking tickets, a ski slope, and girls who desperately want to get married. There are also a few things these schools have in common: math teachers who have no idea what they are talking about, douche bag long-boarders who try to ride as close to you as possible, Asians that travel in large groups, and plenty of blogging material.

Things at OSU are going great, honestly the best school I have ever attended (sorry mom).

"College isn't the place to go for ideas"- Helen Keller.

Later, JG