It's 2am and I didn't proof read this, enjoy!

It has been entirely too long since I have last posted, but I have kind of been busy teaching kids about Jesus. I know that isn't a good reason but its the best I can think of. Honestly this summer has been great. The people here are some of the greatest people I have ever met. When I say some I really do mean some. Probably one of my least favorite people I have met, in my entire life not just at the ranch, is David Cox.

If you don't know who David is think of a almost as attractive Owen Wilson before he broke his nose 3 times and than subtract about 60lbs and take away the hair.That's what he looks like. I think I would rather be co counselors with Helen Keller than David. Although there wouldn't be much of a difference. It's so funny though how he tries to be best friends with me. He is always telling me how good looking and strong I am, it's almost pathetic sometimes. He even told all his friends on Facebook about my blog trying to spark some kind of friendship between us. David Cox I have one question for you, Wwhhere do you get off?

Being at camp all summer naturally makes one want to watch the 1994 comedy Heavy Weights. So tonight I did just that. After watching all those chubby kids jiggle across the screen it made me think about the auditions that went down to be in that movie. I mean what did the ad sound like? We are looking for overweight children, preferably obese and ones that have diabetes, to be in a movie mocking fat kids. Yeah if I had a fat kid, or a ginger, I would probably make them try out for a part and than spend there money but tell them its in a college fund. I can't wait until I'm a parent.

One of my favorite things about being a counselor is just being sarcastic with campers. It's so funny whenever they catch on, but even more funny when they have no idea and think I'm really that mean. Another favorite thing is the questions they ask me. The following is a list of questions asked by 3rd graders week one:

I asked my cabin who had sinned and my camper replied, "I have, I say the "F" word like 50 times a day."

While swimming, "Is your tattoo spanish or something?"

"I want to be you Mr. John, you get to yell at kids and tell them to go to bed."

Two boys talking, "You slept naked? Yeah not even socks!"

What's an orgy? (thanks to a verse read in chapel)

"The blob sounds like boob, Why do girls have boobs? Thats just wrong."

"I can't be a missionary in Africa, I'm allergic to lots of African things."

"Can Mexicans got to Heaven?"

Chubby camper 1, "I'm on a diet." 2nd camper "You ate 6 Reece's pieces today." Chubby, "Yeah I normally eat 6."

Oh the joys of campers!

"Destiny knows where you live, will you be home when it comes over to see if you can play?"- Pete and Pete.

Later, JG

That's Right, I Blogged About It.

It has been about 2 weeks since my last blog and I really don't feel as if I need to often since the 2.5 people who read this are constantly with me this summer anyways. Tomorrow is going to be a big day for me, it will be the first time I have taken a shower, with soap, since May 11th. I really don't want to because I'm curious to see how long I can go, but the time has finally come. I don't really have a good reason for not showering, but I usually never have a good reason for anything that I do.

Speaking of not having a good reason to do something, tonight was the talent show thing at NLR. Me and my small group decided to do this parody of "Like a Boss" by Andy Samberg. Lets just say it was the end of my short rapping career. I may pursue that dream later but for now I will stick to the white person that I am.

I have been looking forward to camp for so long its weird finally being here. The only thing I wasn't expecting was how much I would be made fun of. I feel as if I am the only guy who can't go sleeveless, talk to a girl, or blog without everyone making me feel like a terrible person. Oh well at least no one can see me cry myself to sleep at night.

"You're a mountain that I would like to climb, not to conquer but to share in the view. You're a bondfire I will gather around you"- Incubus

Later, JG

Do you want to have a summer party in my basement?

Well I'm finally in Oklahoma, and as it does each time I arrive I feel as if I had never left. Myself along with my little sister Kaitlin and bestie Lindsey left North Carolina around 8 pm on Thursday night. It wasn't a bad drive at all it actually went by a lot faster than I was expecting. I ended up driving all through the night and until about 11 am my body time and I think I only fell asleep a few times. Whoever created those rumble strips along the highway is a genius. I'm just messin... kind of.

I decided the make the trip without any caffeine at all to avoid a crash later, figuratively and literally. So I made the 16 hour drive on Gatorade, 8 burgers from Wendy's, and all the Casha anyone could ever dream about. It's funny how one's mind begins to play tricks while driving at 4 am. I kept imagining I was on some weird secret mission, but I can't remember where I was going. I just couldn't raise any suspicion because that would mean getting pulled over by the cops and they wanted to get information out of me. I guess that was the only way to keep myself from speeding on those long strips of Tennessee highway where no one was in sight. Didn't get pulled over so I guess I did alright.

So I was riding back from Wal-Mart yesterday and I'm getting over a pretty nasty sunburn and my chest and shoulders are peeling pretty badly. I was sitting in the passenger seat with the windows rolled down and I started scratching my shoulder without really thinking about it. Next thing I know the girl sitting behind me asked me to stop because my dead skin was landing on her. I'm pretty good at first impressions.

Right now I'm sitting in the staff lounge at NLR. It's moldy and smells terrible, the couches are wet, everything is out of place, yet there is honestly nowhere else on earth I would rather be.

"With the lights out, it's less dangerous, here we are now entertain us. I feel stupid, and contagious, here we are now entertain us"- Kurt Cobain.

Later, JG

Talked Me Into It

Ah its summertime. No more papers, finals, nasty cafeteria food, and most of all no more paleness! That's right I'm going to the beach tomorrow to get my tan/skin cancer on. The weather is actually calling for isolated thunderstorms the entire time I will be there so knowing my luck I wont get tan and I will probably get struck by lightning. I'm going with my bestie so it will be fun regardless. She and I both share in the love of creepin so I can imagine I will be getting some good stories these next few days.

I'm driving out to Oklahoma this week and I can't wait to get there but the only thing holding me back is the 16 hour drive to get out there. I try to make 16 hours not sound like a long time by breaking it down, but so far telling myself its like driving to LU 8 times in a row, or to New York City and back, or just halfway to California, isn't working out too well.

There are lots of things that people do that just don't make any sense. One of these is graduations. Think about it, lets go watch someone else's kid put on a dress and a lame hat, have someone read his or her name so he or she can walk across a stage and than sit back down, and than you give them a card with money? I mean isn't graduating high school something that even the most average teenager does? So for doing what you're suppose to do you get tons of money. Shouldn't it be the other way around? I mean they graduated they are going to make more money than those who don't graduate, lets give money to those who didn't graduate, that just makes more sense to me.

Every time I see those commercials on TV late at night where they show these pretty good looking girls advertising phone dating. I mean that's a great way to meet a creeper, but call me old fashioned but usually people just leave their couches to meet "local hot singles." What do I know I'm sure their are plenty of classy people out there phone dating.

"We don't need your hypocrisy, execute real democracy, post-industrial society, the unthinking majority"-Serj Tankian.

Later, JG

Kaitlin's Bday post

Oh man six more days and I'm out of here. This year has gone by pretty fast but I know this next week won't be over fast enough. Today was good though all classes where canceled for a "Reading day". It's kind of a ridiculous thing but whatever I got to go bridge jumping today and that was sick as always.

The bridge we jump off of is close to a pretty big camping/trail place so its a public bridge but apparently jumping off is not allowed. So when I got there with my group there was a cop there and told us we weren't allowed to jump of the bridge. He left and about two minutes after he was gone people were jumping off again. Its about a 40ft jump so its good for adrenaline. The entire time I was thinking about what my mom always said "If your friend jumped off a bridge would you do the same thing?" Unfortunately, I was always the friend who was jumping off trying to get everyone else to follow me. In the end no one got too hurt and the fuzz didn't come back.

While we were all jumping a group of people who were hiking stoped to watch. I talked to a few of them and found out that they all have been hiking for two months now and started in Georgia and where headed to Maine following the Appellation Mountains. It was so cool and they all told me I should seriously do it, and now I seriously want to. (anyone who wants to let me know because I'm down like a frown) We talked for about 5 mins or so and found out they all started their hike alone and met each other and have been friends since. As I was about to leave one of them asked me if I knew where he could buy some "herb" that was pretty funny.

Typical black people, whoever yells the loudest and gets the angriest gets the ball back.-Random black guy at the bball courts.

Later, JG

Everybody Wants to be a Backstreet Boy.

I just took a lot of Nyquil before I started this post, just to let you know. Looking back on some of my post(not that I have very many to choose from) I have noticed some misspelled words and a few grammar mistakes. I'm not apologizing by any mean it's my blog I will write whatever I want, but I just wanted everyone who read this, yes all 4 of you, that I am aware of my mistakes.

One of the things that has brought joy into my life, surprisingly, is whenever someone who I know very well or not well at all tells me they read my blog. I feel honored that someone would seriously take the time to read about the things that happen in my day or what I'm thinking. The reason this makes me so happy is because it assures me that people waste their time on stupid things which justifies the stupid things I read or watch. Sometimes I wish I had a life but than I wouldn't be able to sleep all day.

Sleep is honestly one of my favorite things of all time. Whenever I'm not in class, eating, or playing N64 in my room, you will find me in bed. It has gotten to the point where I try to talk myself out of things to do just so I can sleep. Example I really needed a shower the other night and I was standing in my room trying to decide what to do. I could either take a ten minute shower and than sleep and feel nice and clean, or just get in bed fall asleep and forget how badly I smelt. I went with plan B and just told myself it was preparation for camp. This weekend was pretty grand as far as sleep goes. On Saturday I got up at 10am to go hiking, got back at 1pm and slept until 7 pm. Sunday woke up at 2 pm to go bridge jumping with my bestie Lindsey Kirkland got back at 5 pm and slept until 10:30 pm. It really was one of the best weekends I have had in awhile.

The fact that its May and camp is almost here is crazy. I can't wait to be with some of my favorite people in the world and hopefully be bringing one of my best friends with me this year, but we'll see. This will be a big year for myself and I'm looking forward to see what all will be in store.

"I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ." -Mahatma Gandhi

Later- JG

Would you like to go to the pants party?

Today was a pretty good day. Finished a project on time and went to a math study group. So after the study group I went to the rot alone because all my friends had already eaten. I get there and the place is filled with Asians. The Asians at Liberty are some of the nicest people I have ever met and seeing them there reminded me that one of my goals this year was to become friends with one of them. I figured I could help them with their English and they could help me in math. That sounds like a pretty fair trade to me.

A few days ago I lost my key to my room and I have still yet to find it. The only problem with this is I can't get into my dorm. Once inside my dorm I can get inside my room by using a credit card (It's pretty sweet actually I feel one of the Spy Kids). So today I was locked outside my dorm and I'm pretty lazy so I didn't feel like texting someone to let me in. So I'm standing there weighing my options when I notice my window is open and I have a ice cream cone in my hand. So I had to get Ryan's attention so I through the ice cream into my room hoping someone would notice. Luckily I have amazing aim and managed to not get any ice cream on any of my stuff.

One of my favorite shows of all time is Nitro Circus. If you haven't seen it I highly recommend it. This show always inspires me which is not necessarily a good thing if you are aware of my past injuries. But nonetheless I watch it as often as I can. Today I was thinking that I would really enjoy moving out to California and becoming a stuntman. The money is good and I could be in movies but no one would no who I am; therefore no paparazzi. I would make a good stuntman for Will Ferrel because we have similar features. I would work along side Will and we would share a laugh or two and soon become best friends. He would later introduce me to the staff of SNL and Andy Samberg and myself would do a Digital Short. What a life that would be.

I think if everyone got a tattoo the world would be a lot less judgmental.

Later, JG